Parenting

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Is Your Child Afraid of Being Embarrassed?

Dr. Paul | October 31, 2013 |

Recently, a friend of mine described his 7-year-old daughter’s fit before school. “Don’t come into school with me” she yelled. She didn’t want to be seen with her Dad when she walked into her first grade classroom.

Joey was afraid that his Mom would yell too loud during his soccer game. “Don’t be too noisy” he warned. He hated the idea that the other kids would hear her.

Sarah didn’t want her Mom to hang out at her 9 year old friend’s birthday party for the same reason—she was afraid of being embarrassed.

I remember the same feeling when I was 13 years old. I was... Read More

Shyness: What Is It?

Dr. Paul | October 14, 2013 | 3 comments

Ashley, a 5th grader, is a good student, does her homework, and is bright. But on her progress report, as in the past, her teacher noted that she doesn’t participate much in class. Her teacher would like to see her raise her hand more, talk more in group discussion, and share her ideas with others. Her teacher wonders why this smart girl is so reserved.

At her parent-teacher conference, her mom pipes up—“Ashley is shy.” But what does that mean? Is that a problem? Is there some deeper underlying concern? Is she anxious or worried? Has she been bullied? All of these questions arise.... Read More

Winning and Losing: When is Praise Positive or Negative?

Dr. Paul | October 10, 2013 | 1 comment

Fall sports are in high gear once again, after summer’s slower pace. Parents are lining soccer and football fields watching their kids practice and play competitive sports. It’s fun for everyone. It’s great to see kids running up and down the field, instead of sitting in front of an electronic screen playing video games. Team sports can teach children a wide range of skills and abilities that are very useful in adult life.

Parents sometimes wonder what kind of behavior should they praise--effort, participation, performance, attitude, or team spirit? A recent article in The New York... Read More

Progress Reports Are Here! Help!

Dr. Paul | October 07, 2013 | 6 comments

Charlie started 9th grade this year. Last year was hard for him, and his grades were C’s when they had been B’s. But he and his parents chalked it up to middle school distractibility (those hormones are something aren’t they?). But he was gung ho for 9th grade and ready to rock and roll. The only problem---he’s doing even worse than he did last year! Help!

He has lots of missing homework and his test scores aren’t so hot either. The progress report, which comes out in the beginning and middle of October reflected his performance.

Sarah started 11th grade this year and her... Read More

What About Fighting in Front of the Kids?

Dr. Paul | September 30, 2013 | 3 comments

Growing up, I can never remember my parents arguing with each other. If they did fight, it was in private. Then, when I was 13, both my parents sat my brothers down and told us that they were getting divorced! My brothers and I were shocked. We just never saw it coming.

My wife and I weren’t afraid to disagree with each other. Most of our arguments were about the kids—we never fought about money. We were raised very differently, and so we had very different ideas about discipline and expectations. I do have to admit that we could get pretty loud—but we always resolved tension before... Read More

Stomachaches in Children

Dr. Paul | September 19, 2013 | 3 comments

“Mom, my tummy hurts!” This kind of complaint is commonplace with some kids. Frequently, their symptoms are vague. “Where does it hurt?” Dad asks. “I don’t know,” whines Joey, “It just hurts.” Sometimes kids will feel nauseous too.

Anxiety or nervousness can cause kids and adults to have “butterflies” in their stomach just an unfriendly feeling. And, it can sometimes cause sharp pain too. It’s always good to check these problems out with your pediatrician or family doctor before assuming that they are of a nervous nature. Sometimes it’s hard to tell.

When Mary, age 12, has a... Read More

More on Work/Life Balance

Dr. Paul | September 16, 2013 | 5 comments

In 2013, this topic continues to be a source of debate and discussion. It’s not hard to figure out why. In the hey days of the early 2000’s, when the economy was soaring, many high powered Moms, working 60 hours a week, just threw down their laptops and said—“Enough! I can’t take it anymore!” It was just too hard to balance a big job (lawyer, doctor, or business executive) with taking care of two or three young children. They were fried. At that time, there was a lot of media attention given to this group of women that left their jobs to be able to see their children off in the morning, be... Read More

The New School Year: Limiting Screen Time

Dr. Paul | September 05, 2013 |

I know. I am starting to sound like an old fogey. I recognize that at 62, I am an immigrant to the land of Facebook, smart phones, texting, sexting, video games, and the internet. (At least I now know what “twerking” refers too! Thank you Miley!)

But I did grow up with television, the video screen of the 1960’s. And now, as then, it is important for parents to think about how much is too much. A recent study found that kids from birth to 8 years of age are spending on average 2 hours a day in front of a two dimensional video screen. Teens are spending up to 6 hours a day in front of... Read More

Back to School: Tips for Parents

Dr. Paul | September 03, 2013 | 1 comment

Kids are always excited about the start of school after a long summer vacation.

There is excitement.

There is worry too. How will I do? Will this year be better than (or as good as) last year? Will I make new friends? Will my old friends still like me? Will I make the team? There can be a long list of concerns for kids of all ages. As a parent, I was always concerned with whether the stress of driving my kids to all their activities would bury me! With the new school year, would I have time to take a breath from time to time?

The first few weeks are busy and hectic. It... Read More

MTV Video Music Awards: Give Me a Break!

Dr. Paul | August 27, 2013 | 12 comments

Did you see Sunday night’s MTV VMA’s? Did your tween or teen watch it? What did you think?

Miley Cyrus put on a show that sells—sex. If you read my recent blog on teenage sexuality, you won’t wonder why your teen or tween is interested in sexual experimentation. The question arises—Is this appropriate? What is the impact of exposure to these images? Is this healthy or unhealthy? What is the message to kids? Rest assured, adults aren’t watching music videos. This medium is for kids.

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